Passwords we all have them, but we all can’t remember them: A satirical observation on the complexity of passwords.
There is so much pressure on choosing the “right” or “R!6ht” password, it has to exceed 6 characters and even though we really wanted to use our dogs name “Spot,” which won’t work since it’s only four characters. So we are then left to think of some other variation to use that we then may or may not remember. Then it becomes an ordeal to just remember is it spot12, Spot123, or SPOT10 since he was ten when you created the password, but was that in human or dog years?
Passwords just aren’t fun anymore, they are stressful. Some people put too much pressure on themselves when creating a password, we promise it’s not like the pressure of trying to win a gold medal at the Olympics. On other end of spectrum some people don’t put enough pressure on creating a strong password (cough) 123456.
Faith Sale once said, “It sometimes feels like the only person from whom your passwords are keeping you safe is YOU.” 1
After forgetting your password you then feel like you need to go to therapy, after being asked enough questions about your childhood to make your head spin. Maybe you don’t have the greatest childhood memories, and you are still recovering from being called, “Chunky Monkey” for the first 13 years of your life. But sure enough, you are prompted to enter in your childhood nickname.
“It may all lead to a profound existential crisis which leaves you yelling at your computer, ‘IT’S REALLY ME, I JUST FORGOT WHO I AM!!!’”1
Some people would argue that passwords are something we have just for the sake of making us feel safe rather, than actually keeping us safe. We don’t agree, a hacker acquiring one or two of your passwords could bring you whole world crashing down. Your bank account could be drained, and even worse they could potentially acquire your social security number and really do some damage.
So adapt password habits that you will remember, and maybe if you are lucky the organization you work for will implement single sign-on, if they haven’t already.